Now that spending money is considered free speech (extreme interpretation of the phrase “money talks”), I am wondering when shooting people will also be considered free speech. I mean shooting people (and before that, poking others with very sharp objects) is a longstanding tradition in political discourse. As the saying goes: “You get a lot further with a kind word and a gun than with a kind word alone.” Obviously, using guns in speech is instrumental.

Another consequence of the recent decision: If corporations are now considered people for political speech, shouldn’t they also acquire all the other rights guaranteed by the constitution? I think they should be able to vote. I’m starting 100 new corporations just for that purpose right now …