19 Mar 2002 olandgren   » (Journeyer)

Life

Life is proving interesting, as always. As of about 12 hours from now, there will be exactly two months until my entire social life graduates and leaves for parts unknown. It should be incredibly interesting -- I'm reminded how much I love my friends every time we do something. Parties over the weekend were mostly good, with some untoward incidents I wasn't directly involved in, but on the whole much more positive than negative.
As far as the female front goes, I managed to ask her on a date, but ended up not getting it due to scheduling conflicts. She did agree, though, which is at least a positive sign, and she doesn't seem to be repulsed by my company. Hopefully I don't mess this one up. One odd thing: I fixed a friend's computer(the power supply was overheating), and on my way back to my room walked past her house. Emilia was sitting in her living room, face in her hands. I just wanted to give her a hug and tell her that she was beautiful and smart and everything would work out. Funny how that works..
Making peace with the fact that your friend is dating another friendly acquaintance, and that you're really, really jealous about it is hard to do. I understand why Katrina is doing what she is, but there's something that just hurts deep inside when you ask "so why is he good enough now, and I wasn't then?" I guess that's one of those nasty little questions that you can't really answer, because it involves looking at stuff inside yourself that I would rather not. I'm sure that she's right and that it would have ended up a complete disaster, but I guess I tend to be more of a damned if you do type of person. Rejection always hurts.

Listening

Tom Heasley - Monterey Bay

Yes, I am listening to Ambient Tuba. You got a problem with that?

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