28 Oct 2014 marnanel   » (Journeyer)

street harrassment

[In a discussion on street harassment elsewhere, some dude said: "Hi [name of OP]. There, I did it. I harassed you. Oh the humanity. Do you NOT get how absurd this looks to us guys? The creeper 5 minute guy, yeah I get that. But just saying hi? Get over yourselves ladies. We have a right to say hi on public streets." This is my reply to him]

Here as everywhere else, context makes a big difference. Here's an example from my own life.

I'm male-bodied; people generally read me as a man. Earlier this year I went to a party in drag (and hey, I thought I looked rather fetching). I was walking down a busy street after dark, when someone in the shadows I couldn't quite see called out "Hello darling."

Ordinarily, I wouldn't hear that a threat. But I can tell you that in *that* context it was a moment of raw terror. All the recent newspaper stories of street assaults ran through my head. If he thinks I'm a woman, maybe he's going to assault me (hell, if he thinks I'm a man in drag, maybe he's going to assault me). By appearing female in public I had effectively painted a huge target on my back.

Now of course men get attacked in the street too. But you don't expect that sort of attack to begin with the attacker saying "hello". If someone had come up to me with a knife I'd have been terrified whether I was dressed as a woman or not. But "hello, darling" is often the start of a very different script, and I was someone who might plausibly be cast in that script in a very unpleasant role.

So I can attest to the terror it can cause when a stranger tries to greet you in the street.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/315765.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2014-10-28 20:28:59 from Monument

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