Older blog entries for marnanel (starting at number 1262)

leaked audio

"If audio of your private convo leaked, what would it say?"

things I have said in private conversations recently:

• "You know elephants? I read that they sing. I wonder what they sing about. Next time I meet one I'll play it music. Elephants are cool."
• "So yeah, when I go to planning meetings they talk about the low-hanging fruit, the easy stuff, but it wouldn't be easy if I was a giraffe."
• "Oh hey, there's a town called Makasar in Turkey. If I took an antimacassar there, they would both vanish. You're probably not allowed to."
• "What if I put helium balloons in the wheelie bin? I think it would be a nice surprise for the dustmen when they opened the lid."
• "And actually I was going to find a bin saying LITTER on it in town, and fill it with glitter, and add a G in front, but then I didn't."
• "People have fish tanks but they never have duck tanks, why not?"
• "It would be awesome to have a pet elk. They have beautiful antlers. I think you would need a litter tray the size of the kitchen."

Syndicated 2016-10-11 10:54:24 from Monument

Self-doubt

New video, by me: In a 1973 BBC interview, Sir John Betjeman said, "I never can believe that I'm any good at all." He was poet laureate of the UK at the time.



This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/379027.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-10-08 14:03:46 (Updated 2016-10-08 14:04:43) from Monument

Miniver Cheevy

MINIVER CHEEVY
by Edwin Arlington Robinson

Miniver Cheevy, child of scorn,
Grew lean while he assailed the seasons;
He wept that he was ever born,
And he had reasons.

Miniver loved the days of old
When swords were bright and steeds were prancing;
The vision of a warrior bold
Would set him dancing.

Miniver sighed for what was not,
And dreamed, and rested from his labors;
He dreamed of Thebes and Camelot,
And Priam’s neighbors.

Miniver mourned the ripe renown
That made so many a name so fragrant;
He mourned Romance, now on the town,
And Art, a vagrant.

Miniver loved the Medici,
Albeit he had never seen one;
He would have sinned incessantly
Could he have been one.

Miniver cursed the commonplace
And eyed a khaki suit with loathing;
He missed the mediæval grace
Of iron clothing.

Miniver scorned the gold he sought,
But sore annoyed was he without it;
Miniver thought, and thought, and thought,
And thought about it.

Miniver Cheevy, born too late,
Scratched his head and kept on thinking;
Miniver coughed, and called it fate,
And kept on drinking.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/378310.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-14 15:49:26 from Monument

counselling

[suicide mention]

In counselling today we started going over the timeline of my life I drew up. We only got up to the start of sixth form, and about my early suicidal ideation, and how I set myself free by giving up having ambitions. We'll carry on next time, which means we're five sessions in and still haven't finished talking about why I'm there!

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/377903.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-13 20:43:38 from Monument

Alcoholic hat

In a waiting room. Marn is wandering around listening to music.

Woman in top hat: (something)
Marn (removes headphones) Sorry?
W: I said, hi!
M: Oh! Hi. Awesome hat, by the way.
W: Alcoholic.
M: Your hat is alcoholic?
W: No, me. I've been in jail. I have DTs.
M: Oh, I'm sorry.
W: Don't be. It's a self-inflicted injury.
M: (randomly) Well, what isn't, in the end?
(W smiles and wanders off while M is still considering whether all injuries are self-inflicted by virtue of the will to live)

UPDATE: W returned and started telling me her life story. She says I'm goodlooking and that she'd go out with me. She also showed me several of her tattoos. On enquiring as to whether I'm unattached, she looked crestfallen, and then said that if that ever changes I should contact her. She appears to be entirely serious. During part of the story about school bullying she abruptly got up and went outside to smoke, leaving me to look after her bag. When I had to leave, she hadn't returned, and I couldn't find her outside, so I handed in the bag at reception. Reception said yes, they knew her quite well.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/377683.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-12 17:37:00 (Updated 2016-09-12 19:37:55) from Monument

dentist talk

[teeth, dentistry, violence]

I have a wonderfully chatty dentist. Recently we have discussed:
1) the problems of being a dentist in Pakistan. Apparently some people's first resort for toothache is an amateur tooth puller. If you're his first patient of the day, you have to wait until the second patient turns up. Then the second patient holds the first patient down, while the tooth puller attaches string to your tooth and pulls very hard. When most of the tooth is removed, the first patient gets up and punches the second patient for holding him down. After all this, the dentist has to fix all the damage.

2) the political situation in Burma, and why the news here doesn't report it much, and how come westerners think Buddhists are never politically violent.

3) why Camden, New Jersey is such a terrifying place.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/377384.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-08 12:35:53 from Monument

"busy"

KIT: And how are things with you?
PRACTICE NURSE: Oh, the usual. Busy, busy, busy. Though I don't mind busy-- it's when things are over-busy, when I'm running late...
KIT: Busy good, stressed bad?
PN: Right.
MARN: It's interesting how the sense has shifted. If you look at how Spenser uses it in the "Fairie Queene", he's using it in your sense of "over-busy". Which is odd, because words usually become more negative over time...
KIT: Marn? If we stay here talking about etymology, she'll be running late and then she'll get stressed.
MARN: Oh yeah. Sorry.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/376900.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-05 11:08:19 from Monument

I don't like Thursdays

filk: "I Don't Like Mondays" by the Boomtown Rats.

now the silicon chip inside your ship
gets switched to overload
and nobody's gonna leave the Earth today
you're gonna make the place explode
and your latest verse is a Vogon curse
with a pain that you can't resolve
you can see no reasons
cos there are no reasons
what reason do you need to evolve?

Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
I want to shoot the planet down.

well it's not too far to the local star
where the plans were on display
so your sympathy for their apathy
just blows them all away
it's okay with you
cos you've just gone through
a painful love affair
you can see no reason
cos there is no reason
what reason do you need to care?

Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
I want to shoot the planet down.

six billion folk go up in smoke
and a trillion angry mice.
you were bought and bribed
it was all prescribed
by the man who paid your price:
there's a secret link
to a scheming shrink
but Halfrunt's just this guy
who has every reason
to destroy the reason--
what reason do you need to die?

Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
Tell me why. I don't like Thursdays
I want to shoot the planet down.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/376324.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-09-03 01:22:05 (Updated 2016-09-03 01:32:32) from Monument

Oolon Colluphid's triology, now in Pelican

Syndicated 2016-08-31 22:19:40 from Monument

Two Ronnies 1984 Christmas special: courtroom sketch

I've seen this sketch many times, but I only just realised that the judge is Patrick Troughton (the Second Doctor from Dr Who).

Some of the gameshows are largely forgotten:
1) What's My Line? (guess someone's job)
2) Mastermind (rapid-fire questions on a subject)
3) Call My Bluff (guess the definition of an obscure word)
4) Blankety-Blank (guess what word someone else used to complete a sentence)
5) Give Us A Clue (charades)
6) It's A Knockout ("play your joker" in a round to double your points)
7) The Price Is Right ("come on down!")

Gaffes:
1) the judge is wearing a barrister's wig
2) no judge in England uses a gavel
3) the defendant is standing in the witness box
4) lawyers don't walk around the courtroom
5) er, court trials don't include gameshow references.

This entry was originally posted at http://marnanel.dreamwidth.org/375907.html. Please comment there using OpenID.

Syndicated 2016-08-19 12:35:33 from Monument