6 Dec 2005 faw   » (Journeyer)

Hi Advogato! :-) Once again, a long time without any posts, I'm not sure if somebody actually reads my diary. I'm still trying to get a couple of itens more up-to-date (including blog/diary), I hope to achieve that! This post is splitted in two parts tech and non-tech stuff. :o)

We are working hard on debian-l10n-portuguese. There is a proposal to split the list to create a Brazilian Portuguese localization list, the idea is sleeping for now but I'm planning to wake it soon. My packages are a little bit stopped for now, I'm still working with Luk Claes and Christian Perrier, but I have a couple of new packages to work out with Otavio Salvador (another sponsor). I'm also trying to take good care of Debian-BR-CDD QA area and to give some attention to DebianZine (Brazilian fanzine).
During the last weeks I got the chance to visit nice places and the oportunity to met really good people. I attended Conisli, Latinoware Mercosul, SOLISC and OpenBeach. Very good events, I had the chance to talk about Debian in all of them. The last one, OpenBeach, is more social then techical, the idea is get people from free software projects having fun without computers (going to the beach, talking around the swimming pool, going out to have dinner). Well... it is not completely without computers, but we try to use it a little bit less the usual. :-)
[NON-TECH][Sometimes, it is time to move forward...]
Well... I did not setup a blog yet... and I try to keep advogato more technically, but sometimes... we could make some exceptions. :-)

I consider myself a member of Cathedral for quite a while now. Even if I contribute just a little bit (and my contributions is far from how much I would like to contribute) I always felt like being part of something, being part of a team, being part of a kind of family, which is really nice. Cathedral is not a project, it is more a kind of "Web of Trust", which means that sometimes, you trust people even if you never meet them, and the reason to do such strange thing is because you trust some member of Cathedral that told you about the other person. It is not easy to explain, it is about being friends and it is about believe.

Anyway, in the last days I'm facing a hard time, I had a fight with one of the guys that started Cathedral many years ago. No, we do not fight in real world, we had a hard discussion in our IRC channel. It shouldn't be a big deal, and if I try to explain that as simple as possible here is what I should tell about what happened: I was sad with a couple of friends because the night before and after I told that in the channel we discussed, I'm not quite sure why we discuss, but as I understood, I shouldn't be sad with them, and they are trying to prove me that.

Ok! There are lots of ways to say to somebody: "hey, come on, you shouldn't be sad!" but complain, fight and use hard arguments with a sad person, instead of make the person feels better will get things even worst. Time is a bless and after talking with the friends that make me sad I was able to get things rolling again... anyway, I was not able to figure out why we fight that morning. I always say in my work place: We are living strange days... and that is an undeniable truth (right now!). I mean, he is a great friend of mine, we used to talk a lot, exchange ideas, make fun of each other, teach each other (ok, I learn much more with him than he learns from me, anyway, that is not the point), and now, we almost don't speak with each other. I'm not sure what are the feelings on the wire, I don't know if he is angry, mad, crazy, sad or if he has plans to kill me, what I know is that I don't like how things are going. :o(

But... in the last days, something cross to my mind... maybe (and I really mean maybe) my time on being part of cathedral is getting to an end (Matrix: everything that has a begin has an end). Which means that, unfortunately, I did what I was supposed to did and walk forward should be the next reasonable movement. I thought that a week ago but I was not sure. Looking again, maybe my role was bring more people to Cathedral to create a really good team, a really group! It is strange to say that, it is even stranger to think about that, but if you look carefully, I'm not contributing as much as I can (and specially as much as I should) and I'm not being part of Cathedral like the others. There is another detail to be considered: the fact that some people came do what they have to do and leave, like some tools, they do what they are supposed to do and them we move them to another place where people will need it.

I had no intention to leave Cathedral, but the last events and the delicated situation in which I'm feeling like disrupting something or bothering people, make me think about starting cleaning up and progressively moving away to give people the space they need. Sun Tzu said that a general should know when is the right time to fight and when is the right time to leave. I do not want to fight, I do not want to lose my friends, so perhaps it is time to leave. Yeah! Now you can say that this is one of that sad posts! Maybe I'm wrong and we will be able to find out what is going on and I will discover that I'm still part of Cathedral (and hopefully I will be for a long time), maybe I'm right and it is time to change (2006 is right there, knocking on the door), maybe I'm just too asleep right know, maybe not... who knows? Probably the time will say... hope that it don't take too much time. :o)

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